just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
Randomize
