When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
We talked him into tasing himself.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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