Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
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