my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Randomize
