There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
