what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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