Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize
