great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
