Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Randomize
