Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize