You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
