I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
I got her a Nickelback box set.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
