Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
