well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
