I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
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