Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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