whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
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