just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
