Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
When are your genitals available?
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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