you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I wish there were birth control emojis
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
well, you know. whores of a feather.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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