I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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