oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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