wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
