I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
