Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
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