he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
My bed is full of blood and feathers
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
