My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
