I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I'm experimenting with sincerity
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize