I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
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