btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize