I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
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