I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
