its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
