omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
