Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
whose ass print is on the piano?
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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