It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
