ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
This baby is an asshole
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Randomize
