as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Randomize