In the future we'll all be gay
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
