Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
stop calling my apartment porn island.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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