Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
It's just like the Real World with babies
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize