That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Randomize
