How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
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