Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
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