Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize