How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
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