She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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