and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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