Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Randomize
