my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Randomize
