Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
