i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
