Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
Randomize
